spiritually thirsty.........

Back at the beginning of November, our church held a "venture in discipleship" weekend (also known as a Lay Witness weekend). I honestly was dreading it, b/c I was asked to be on a committee, host a "coffee" at our house, and attend the meetings leading up to this weekend. I now know that the devil was planting that dread into my heart. I told myself leading up to that weekend that I was ready for it to be over with before it even had a chance to start. I had decided going into it that I was only going to attend the Friday night meeting, and host my coffee, and that was it! (Well, the Lord had other plans, you see! )

Friday night we had supper before the meetings actually started. We all went to the supper, and it was followed up by testimonies given by the team members from other churches. One man in particular spoke about healing broken relationships within the family. )For those that don't know, I am on the outs with my bio-dad, and haven't seen or spoke to him since July of 04, and I only met him for the first time in November of 2001. ) The man speaking not only looked and talked like Ronnie, but his name was also Ronald! I blew it off as a coincidence, and tried not to think anything else about it. I didn't even mention my thoughts to Nathan. We broke up into small groups after that, and that went well. The next morning was the coffee at our house. Guess who was assigned to head the discussion at our house??? Yep, Ronald! It was so weird, I felt a connection to him during that devotion/discussion time, like I could talk to him so easily and that he understood. After everyone left, I finally said to Nathan "do you know who he looks like?", his come back was, " you don't even have to tell me, because I've been thinking that ever since last night." He stayed at home, and I went out to the church for lunch. They had supper and more meetings later that evening, and people from our church sharing and giving testimonies. Sunday morning was the last of the weekend events, and we wrapped it up with a big luncheon after church. Ronald came over to us to tell us goodbye, and he sat down to talk to me. He said " I have to tell you this, I have felt such a strong connection to you this entire weekend, and I can't place my finger on why." (oh - he ALSO has a granddaughter named Hannah just like Ronnie does!!!!) I broke down and told him my story behind my father, and this entire weekend how it all has tied together. He asked if he could pray w/ me for Ronnie and for me. Ronald called the house the next week, but we weren't home. I haven't spoke to him since, but I have no doubt that the Lord placed him there at our church for a specific reason in mind. I have been really thinking about whether or not I should reach out to Ronnie for the last several months. Even though he is the one w/ the ball in his court, and I feel I shouldn't have to be the one to go to him, this whole situation has weighed heavily on me. That was one thing that Ronald mentioned in his testimony. It doesn't matter who is wrong or who is right, you just need to say " I forgive you" and "let's get past this". I haven't taken any drastic steps yet toward that, but I do plan on at least sending him a card over Christmas w/ a picture of Adam and Hannah in it, so that he can see what his grand kids look like.

I majorly got sidetracked there! What I wanted to originally say was ever since that weekend, I have felt like a new person. I can't get enough of listening to cont. Christian music on the radio, reading devotional blogs online, changing my attitude about so many things. I am praying more, turning my problems over to the Lord more, instead of trying to tackle them by myself. I've been praying that the Lord will mold and use Nathan in the way that He needs him to be, not as I would have him to be.

I just want to make our Lord proud in my actions, thoughts and deeds. He has truly blessed so many areas of my life in both the sunshine and the storms. Even after the storms, I am able to see the rainbow! Praise God!!